Striving Towards Our Goals Should be Inclusive

Rather of looking at people as problems we can look at them as opportunities to build community. The most fulfilling part of working towards any meaningful endeavor are the transformational relationships we forge. When we lift each other up rather than leave them behind, attainment of our goals becomes about creating impact instead of self-importance -- about becoming more instead of just gaining more. 

The Worst they Can Say is, "No." So who cares?

Learning to endure failure is critical. When you build that muscle you are honing an even more important one: resiliency. The capacity to bounce back from setback after setback after setback is integral part of any meaningful endeavor. But far more importantly, when you reframe failure as deferred success you begin to take setbacks in stride and use them as building blocks to greater character.

My first screenplays were so bad my friends didn't even know where to begin with their feedback. My first attempt at getting a literary agent was met by well over 100 rejections. And my short films were passed on by so many festivals I lost count. But I didn't stop. I kept writing blogs, articles, screenplays, one-man shows, and even a book. And in time as I developed my voice my confidence grew convincing me I had something of value to offer. 

If there's anything I learned as an actor and a casting reader it's that the worst anyone can say is, "No." But once you hear a few, "No's" you learn to take it all in stride. It's a masterful craft if you think about it: 

Developing the mental mindset and stamina to not take the most personal form of rejection personally. 

If you can hone that skill there's nothing you won't try.

You're a Firefighter

There are only handful of guarantees in life. Perhaps the most prominent being that virtually nothing goes according to plan. Starting a business, writing a book, or making a film for example are such extraordinarily difficult endeavors there's almost no way it possibly could go exactly the way you'd want it to.

We've all received a phone call out of the blue with discouraging news, searched longer that we'd hoped to find a job, or been blindsided by someone's desire to no longer be with us in a relationship, professional or personal.

In other words, you're always going to be putting out fires; unexpected hurdles on your journey to living a fulfilling career and life.

Once you accept your perennial role as a firefighter it's actually quite liberating. You understand that life requires you to pivot, be on your toes, and think flexibly. Once you understand this you're less likely to become discouraged or thrown off at the next curve ball thrown your way because you've conditioned yourself to adjust.

Strap on your helmet and handle adversity with poise. It's just another reliable step to getting to where you want to be.

Check Your Team

No meaningful endeavor is achieved alone. "It takes a village," they say. But what if your village is not filled with like-minded and supportive people? 

The way I see it, you're only option is to get around the right people. The right people can make you feel as though anything is possible. They act as a sounding board when things are going according to plan, they'll listen without judgement, encourage you to raise your standards, but most importantly they'll hold you accountable to achieving the things you say you will.

The wrong people can start to become a real drag and project their own insecurities on to you. If you're not careful you'll let that toxicity get to you and even start to share their doubts.

Find your All-Star squad and don't look back. 

Fine Tuning

Change is inevitable, but progress is not. Sooner or later everything changes. Your body starts to tells you what it can no longer do, new neighbors move in, and children grow up. 

But adaptability is a choice to evolve with those changes. In the process of that change, it’s important to confront some difficult questions: 

Am I looking for solutions to modern day challenges? Am I staying open to new possibilities, or am holding on to a method that is now obsolete? 

Having grit, passion, and hard work is certainly a necessity for any endeavor worth achieving. But it doesn't mean a little fine-tuning on our strategies from time to time would hurt.

Just a Few Tiny Adjustments is All it May Take

I once heard the difference between hitting a golf ball on the fairway versus in the sand pit is a matter of millimeters. Similarly, in Darren Hardy's bestselling book The Compound Effect he shares the following:

“If the nose of the plane is pointed only 1 percent off course – almost an invisible adjustment when the plane’s sitting on the tarmac in Los Angeles – it will ultimately end up about 150 miles off course, arriving either upstate in Albany or in Dover, Delaware.

The point is, establishing productive habits that will inch you closer to your goals and highest aspirations is not as dramatic as you may think. Hard work and consistency are staples for any endeavor worth pursuing, but far too many people believe that in order to be great their lives need to head in a completely different direction.

Take inventory of your habits. You may be just a few tiny adjustments, which compounded over time, will lead you to where you want to be.

You Gotta Start Somewhere

One of the reasons people never begin a creative endeavor is because the distance between where they are and where they hope to be feels so daunting. What's helped me over the years see a project through from beginning to end is breaking it up into small stages, while trying to infuse a little bit of perspective into the overall goal.

Start small. Whether you're an actor, writer, singer, or visual artist begin by beginning. Set aside a specific time each day where you'll work on your craft, or build your project. It can even be 10 minutes a day until it becomes a discipline. From there you can slowly increase the amount of time you work until it accommodates your schedule and gradually moves the needle forward. Just make it a priority.

And that part about perspective? What's helped me is the realization that every project, whether the screenplay for a critically acclaimed film, or a best-selling novel began at a dimly lit kitchen table, or a noisy coffee shop, with a first word, a stroke of the brush - an idea.