"Some People Need to Move to Think"

In a 2006 TED Talk, author, speaker, and educational adviser Sir Ken Robinson said, "Many talented, brilliant, creative people think they're not because the thing they were good at in school wasn't valued or was actually stigmatized. And I think we can't afford to go on that way."

A few weeks ago, I taught an acting workshop. During a break I spoke with a gentlemen in standing in the back of the room who was patiently waiting for his teenage son. "My son texted me several times during the class to thank me for taking him here." I told him how great I thought that was. "No," he said. "You don't understand. He's being bullied at school for wanting to be an actor so this really meant a lot."

It's important to understand that intelligence and creativity is diverse. We need to move toward embracing those remarkable differences rather than denouncing them. 

What's more, we must also protect our own sense of being despite pressure to conform.

Get Good at the "In-Betweens"

Life is mostly “in-betweens.” But because we’ve become so goal-oriented we consider anything less than a step bringing us closer to our aspirations worth speeding through. We’re all blowing past moments we may someday wish we hadn’t.

Why not become masterful at the little things? Take pride in how you make your bed, or engage with the cashier at your favorite coffee house.

These moments add up to mastery in every day life, which of course is life.

In time, those skills may translate into something bigger and even help get you closer to a dream. Of course, by then you’ll also appreciate attainment of the goal is not the point but rather who you become in its pursuit.

Energy Begets Energy

"A human being is the kind of machine that wears out from lack of use. There are limits, or course, and we do need healthful rest and relaxation, but for the most part we gain energy by using energy...If we could tap as little as an added 10 percent of this vast resource, our lives would be significantly altered." 

George Leonard, author of Mastery, has a terrific point. We actually expend a great deal of energy deciding not to do things that we could. We invest the time we could spend on projects of value on Netflix binges or sleeping in. 

If we somehow found the ability to dig deep and push ourselves just a little more, while making a few sacrifices we could significantly alter our way of living - multiplying our productivity along the way.

In time it would become habit. We'd get energy by using it.  

No Industry Like It

"Being an artist is the only line of work where you're considered a quitter if you move on to something else," I heard a friend say. "If you're a lawyer and then decide to teach, nobody says anything. You just switched careers."

I thought about his words for quite a while after our conversation. He had a point. Not only does walking away from being an artist often entail a stigma, but far more difficult, the loss of identity. "If I'm not an actor then who am I?"

All I've learned is the more you build up who you are as a person, broaden your understanding of the world, and clarify the role you hope to play in it, you'll slowly evolve into a person who refuses to be defined by just one thing. 

When you take comfort in the knowing you're a three-dimensional person with skills, stories, and gifts to offer beyond your art form, you'll take greater comfort in your hiatus from your first love, however long that may be.

A New Day

Each day presents you with an opportunity to be better than you were the day before; to let go of how you may have fell short, the negative thoughts you allowed to influence your perception of yourself, and the discouragement you felt. 

Today, is the chance to be a new person.  

"Renew thyself completely each day: do it again, and again, and forever again.'

- Henry David Thoureau

6 Months

Last night I spoke with an actor friend who said, "It's finally starting to feel okay living in Los Angeles." She'd lived in Tinsel Town for about 6 months. Over the years I'd heard people say the same thing about New York, Houston, or really any place when I sat and thought about it.

There's something about allowing yourself time to stumble through a new community. Everything from getting familiar with the local highways to carving out your own circle of friends can seem overwhelming at first. I remember moving to Los Angeles a few years back and spending a considerable amount of time scolding my GPS system for leading me astray in the maze of highways that make up Southern California. 

In time, I got my footing the same way I did in New York and any other place I've lived for an extended period of time. If you're in a new town and starting to feel a little isolated or lost, make sure to give yourself some time. As long as you keep putting yourself out there and making the most of each opportunity you'll be sure to turn a corner. 

Fall in Love with the Plateau

In George Leonard's book, Mastery he talks about the importance of falling in love with the plateau.

"To love the plateau is to love the eternal now, to enjoy the inevitable spurts of progress and the fruits of accomplishment, then serenely to accept the new plateau that waits just beyond them. To love the plateau is to love what is most essential and enduring in your life."

In other words, we need to protect our desire for mastery from the daily onslaught of noise against it; to pay no mind to the get rich quick, lose weight quick, and take this pill to solve all your problems stories we're told. 

Instead, becoming great at something requires falling in love with the process itself even when you feel as though you're getting nowhere.

You'll derive satisfaction not from the likes or followers you get, but the satisfaction you'll gain in starting and committing to something important to you.

Embrace Your Strengths

At one point in life or another we may have wished we were wired differently. Maybe you wish you had the entrepreneurial spirit of a Steve Jobs, or Jeff Bezos. Perhaps you wish you understand numbers like Warren Buffett, or could nimbly dribble around opposing players like Lionel Messi. Sometimes we long for the strengths of others because we're told by society we should or because the marketplace places a high premium on those skill sets.

But it's also important to recognize the talents you have that don't come as easily to others. Maybe your gift is understanding people, or patience. It might be working with children, or listening. Just because your abilities are not as glamorous doesn't mean they aren't of great value.

Identify your strengths, be grateful for them, find ways to build upon them, and then find someone to add that value to.

A Word to the Actor

Fill your life with as many meaningful people, relationships, and experiences as possible. Each will serve you in unimaginable ways and infuse your work with a heightened sense of awareness and purpose. Remember to live a life and not just a career.

Rich relationships will also provide you an honest and reliable soundboard where you can get the feedback you may or may not want to hear, but may still need to make strides toward your goals.

Get Feedback

For several months I've been trying to find opportunities to teach, mainly at the university level. I felt quite confident during the application process in both my ability as an educator and the body of work I've put together over the years. Still, I wasn't being considered for many of the institutions where I felt I'd be a good fit. 

Recently, one school reached out and thanked me for taking the time to apply but told me they decided to go with another candidate. I sent a message back saying I was thankful for her consideration before asking for feedback on how I could improve my chances of working at a school like hers. To be honest, I didn't even expect a response.

A few hours later, she replied with a thoughtful and insightful letter telling me all the variables to consider that I hadn't. I learned not to take anything personally, that you might have a great set of skills the place you are applying to just doesn't need at the moment, and finally, it never hurts to just ask.

It is what it is

"It is what it is," used to be an expression I found troubling. It felt like someone was trying to state something obvious, while still being really vague.

But as I've gotten older I've grown to appreciate what it means and realize it's more nuanced than it may first seem. 

"It is what it is," means exactly that. "What is." Not, what it was, what it could have been, or even what it will be.

First dealing with the present moment allows you to take accountability of the reality of the current situation then decide how you want to proceed. 

It's a good anchor and keeps you from drifting back to what you could have done differently, which no longer matters. It's all about what you can do now.

Not Always a Silver Lining

For a long time I tried to find the meaning in just about everything, especially setbacks. There must be some silver lining here somewhere? I'd think to myself. And often times there was.

But even with time, lessons sometimes failed to reveal themselves. As much as we want to attach meaning to every obstacle we face sometimes bad things just happen. And often to good people.

Still, we can take solace in knowing it will pass and that at the very least we've been conditioned to weather others setbacks like it. Because they will come.

Gaining Perspective

Often times when find ourselves in some type of funk, the root is an over-focus on ourselves and an under-commitment to others. There are lots of ways to "get over ourselves" and put that very energy into a cause greater than ourselves. .

We can help someone else who could really use a hand. Start small and sign up to work as a volunteer at your local community center, church, or wherever you find would be the best fit. It may take a little trial and error. 

But to help others help themselves lends greater integrity to your ambition and will be sure to put your challenges into perspective.

Circle of Influence

It's great to have a strong and large circle of influence, but it's far more important to know your limits.

Knowing your limits allows you to go all in on what you do best a further maximize your growth and potential.

Buffett's Rules

As the story goes, business magnate and investor Warren Buffett was once trying to help one of his employee reach greater heights in personal and financial life.

"Make a list of 25 goals you have in life. Don't hold back, don't over-think it, just write em' out."

The gentlemen did as he was told and soon came up with the list. "Here they are," he said.

"Good," Buffett said. "Now, circle your top 3 and pour every ounce of your being into seeing those goals through. You know what you do with the other ones?" he asked.

"Sure," the man said. "Chip away at them when I have the time."

"No!" Buffett exclaimed. "Throw them away and avoid them at all costs."

Find your vital functions, zero in on them, and cut out all other distractions. Heighten your focus.

Want but Don't Need

In Oren Klaff’s book, Pitch Anything, he talks about the importance of eradicating neediness:

“If you talk to investment bankers, the pros that make million dollar decisions almost daily, they’ll tell you – validation – seeking behavior (neediness) is the number one deal killer.”

As a young actor, I must have reeked of desperation as I entered casting rooms. When I first came out of grad school my life seemed to hang in the balance depending on how well an audition went. I spent hours prepping, regardless if the audition was for a series regular or two lines on a procedural. I was maniacal about my homework. And if the audition didn’t go exactly as I planned I was devastated. I placed such high stakes on each and every audition that my nerves were often a mess.

But the older I got the more I realized the importance of wanting, but not needing. I learned to give my best audition then go about my day knowing if it didn't work out there’d be plenty of other people who’d love to work with me. Developing this mindset came from living a well-rounded life full of other interests, rich relationships, and an empowering sense of self.

Dangerous Habit

One of the best ways to waste your time not only as an actor, but I suppose in general, is to compare yourself to others. Whether it's classmates, or famous actors that have you going on an IMDB binge to see what someone accomplished by the time they were your age, all roads are sure to lead to unhelpful destinations.

If you're currently in BFA, or MFA training programs, or just taking classes regularly, it's important to know some people will get a break right out the gates and some won't. The important thing is not to get caught up in what others are doing. Try and support your colleagues as best you can knowing there's enough pie for everyone. Your success doesn't need to come at the expense of someone else's failure.

You are only in competition with yourself. Your only job is to be better than you were yesterday. Not just as an artist but at life.