At a Crossroads

Last week alone I spoke with three actor friends who felt equally lost in their pursuits. "I don't jump out of bed anymore," one told me. "I'm at a crossroads," another said. 

I listened not quite knowing what to say. Instead, I shared how I'd dealt with the very same challenges when I wrestled with my own doubts of whether to continue acting.

The truth is, what you want at 25 will be different than what you want at 45. It doesn't mean you've quit a dream but that you've evolved as a person, and what you value most in life has changed. It's something we shouldn't feel bad about but should recognize as progress in our personal evolution.

If something is no longer giving you joy it's important to take some personal inventory and ask yourself why. What I've learned this year is we already know all the things we have to do. When we phone a close friend, or seek advice we're merely hoping they echo what we already know to be true within.

World traveler and best-selling author, Chris Guillebeau asks himself these two questions to determine when it's time to try something new:

1. Is it working?
2. Is it making me happy?

If the answer to both is no it may be time to chart a new path but it's something you need to decide. 

The moment I started to get really honest with myself and explore other meaningful relationships and experiences, opportunities I couldn't have predicted started coming my way. What's more, I became a better and happier artist.

And remember, even if you do decide to take a little break from your first love, you can always come back. A little distance may offer some much needed perspective. 

Having doubts is an integral and even exciting part of life. Just remember to frame it as an opportunity. 

Find Someone Who Only Believes in Possibility

If you're ever in need of inspiration get around someone young. I recently started working with a 22-year old actor from Los Angeles who has infused a new sense of energy into, To the Prospective Artist movement.

His excitement and enthusiasm for the mission to help actors and artists live bold lives "off-stage, full of new experiences, relationships, and people has been a real inspiration to me.

There is just something about having everything out in front of you than can't be fabricated. There's a joy and belief that anything is possible that accompanies youth and though we can protect that sensibility as we get older, being around someone who only sees how an idea will thrive is pretty special.

Life Happens When You're Planning Something Else

Author and management expert Ken Blanchard once said, "Life is what happens to you when you are planning to do something else." What's his point? 

Well, as a young actor I recall being so rigid and monomaniacal in my pursuit of being a working actor that I had blinders on to just about everyone, or anything that wasn't in harmony with that goal. In the end, it came at a great cost.

It's great to be focused but important to also take some personal inventory. Sometimes what we wanted 2, or 3 years ago isn't what we want now. And rather than plowing through and not listening to that voice, it's important we stay flexible in our thinking and recognize it may be a sign to do something else completely.

That may sound like you're giving up on a dream, but I would argue it means you've evolved as a person and the things you value have simply changed. There's no shame in that. In fact, it takes courage.

Work harder on yourself than you do on your career and you'll develop the self-awareness to know if what you're doing isn't working, or doesn't resonate with you anymore. You'll also be more likely to do something about it. 

You would be amazed at the opportunities that await you when you approach your life with a mindset of availability.

Sticking With Something

I'm a big proponent of taking breaks when something isn't quite working. Taking a step back from a creative project can sometimes be the most productive step you can take. It allows a broader look at what you're doing and an opportunity to re-energize.

But there's also value in sticking with something just a hair longer than you may want to. There have been many occasions where I've taken my smart phone and scheduled a 45-minute writing block. Around the 40th minute or so, when the well of ideas have seemingly dried up and I'm practically home free, I've been tempted to end the session early.

Yet, it's been those times where I've decided to muscle out the final 5, 10, 15 minutes where breakthrough ideas have often been realized. The actual act of sticking to something and seeing it through can often lend itself to inspiration, or an original idea.

Either way, there's value in industriousness that will not only serve your craftsmanship but begin to shape how you define yourself.