Lessons from Old Theaters

Whether in New York, Los Angeles, or the San Francisco Bay Area I often find myself seeking out old theaters. Many, like the Fox Theater in Oakland have been resuscitated back to life, while others will keep me longing for a time I wasn’t a part of.

If you look carefully, it’s clear many theaters were once churches and synagogues, which depending on your temperament may make the building’s evolution insignificant.

Some actors already view the theater as a sanctuary; a place of community, vulnerability, and at its best a space where words don’t merely pass the time but shed light on our relationship to it.

I love looking at the upcoming seasons and will even go to a show if I have the time. The productions need not be elaborate, nor the show’s leads placed finely on a bright marquee.

I’m just looking for a little reminder of what once was.

Why?

The longer you do anything the easier it becomes to forget why you fell in love with it in the first place. One gradually dismisses from their mind the butterflies they once felt and the interval between desire and attainment where the love first unfolded.

Being near the theater, any theater, reminds me of the fervor, the enthusiasm, the passion I once couldn’t contain — the excitement I felt that someone would come listen to me help tell a story.

And in those moments of highs and low but mostly in-betweens its easy to overlook that special time in my youths of youths where I essentially needed to be dragged off-stage.

Allowing myself to get back in touch with that young man who was once convinced a monologue could change the world helps me to ponder new ways to do the same.

But most importantly that such a feeling is still possible.

It’s not about living in the past or trying to recreate a moment already lived. To do so would mean moving backwards and overlooking the value of the life before you.

Old theaters are simply a way of reminding myself feeling deeply about something, or someone NEVER goes out of fashion.

What are YOUR old theaters?

Time and Purpose

Those familiar with Homer’s epic Greek poem will recall Odysseus’s order for his men to plug their ears with beeswax, and to tie him to the ship’s mast to suppress his urge to listen to the seductive songs of the island’s sirens. 

In Greek mythology, sirens were depicted as beautiful, but also extremely dangerous. Their angelic voices lured unsuspecting sailors to shipwreck.

There stand clear differences between mythological creatures baiting ancient Greek sailors and aimlessly surfing the Internet, but look closely enough and similarities exist. The Internet, email, and smartphones are all forms of modern day sirens. 

Still, it’s important to celebrate your victories and find time to enjoy yourself. I have shamelessly binged on five straight episodes of Master of None on a cold February weekend. 

But as bestselling author Seth Godin writes in his brilliant book, Linchpin, “Understanding that your job is to make something happen changes what you do all day.” 

Artists in particular have to work overtime to two-step around the daily onslaught of the increasingly loud sirens we face today. The very focus and grit required to be a master craftsman is constantly threatened by smartphones, access to a 1,000 channels, and sensationalistic “news.” 

And the truth is, poor time management and a shaky daily structure make you more susceptible to accomplishing nothing of real value.

Time, like that stubborn grandparent, is set in his ways, beyond being reasoned with, refuses to wait for anyone and takes pride in subtly reminding you those ten minutes on SnapChat could have been spent writing that book you’ve told everyone about. 

Or perhaps, the hours spent scrolling the vacation photos of that friend of a friend might have been better used by starting that one-woman show. 

Managing your time effectively allows you a fighting chance to fill your days with purpose and apply the mental beeswax against distraction, ultimately bringing you closer to creating something unique.

2 Simple Productivity Tips to Help Strip Away Distraction

Focus Your Focus

In this age of weapons of mass distraction how do you effectively move your lofty goals forward, while transforming your to-do lists to “success lists?”

In my decade of working as an actor and entrepreneur, I have discovered the best way to do the work that matters is first decide what matters least.

And I’m not the only one…

In his New York Times bestseller, The One Thing Gary Keller stresses the importance of beginning each day by asking once crucial question,

“What’s the one thing I can do today that by doing it everything else will be easier or unnecessary?”

In other words…

Until the most pressing action for moving a project forward is completed everything else should be labeled a distraction.

One of the best ways to do the work that matters most is to first figure out what matters least.

Two Steps for Finding What Matters Most

1. Focus On One Focus at a Time  

Be brutally honest about what is “important” versus “urgent.” Crossing off a task on our to-do list gives us a very addictive drip of dopamine that leads us to rarely question the utility of what we’re doing.  

For example:

My primary objective right now is to build a mailing list so I can add value and share my message to a broader audience.

A few weeks back I managed to convince myself my travel blog, a platform that generates zero revenue, suddenly was in need of a makeover.

I invested time and resources into what is essentially a hobby, when my personal website still lacked a functional email opt-in and tech setup.  

How did I allow myself to veer so far off course? I was afraid to enter the lion’s den of priority and as result clung to work I knew would keep me busy.

Chances are, you’re doing this too.

Eventually, I tabled the blog to my “someday list.” This didn’t mean revamping my travel blog was a no. Instead, it helped me to re-prioritize and make the task a NOT RIGHT NOW.

This allowed me to allocate my time to what mattered most.

What do you need to move to your “someday list” so you can focus on your most important task at hand?

2. Build a “Great Wall of Productivity.”

Think of your most important project as the LAND your wall is protecting and time as the RESOURCES (like food and water) you need to defend for your people. The longevity and sustainability of both depend on the strength of your wall and battalion.

In the beginning, my wall was poorly manned, easy to scale, and breached from top to bottom.

No matter how hard I tried invaders like email, text messages, and other people’s priorities sacked and pillaged my kingdom each day. I needed a better fortification system.

• I raised my walls by blocking off non-negotiable time blocks.
• I filled the cracks by putting my phone on airplane mode.
• And I improved the armor of my soldiers by letting others know I couldn’t be bothered until my top priority was done.

Why?

It’s easier to avoid distractions than resist them.

What are the forces clashing up against your wall of productivity?

Keep a piece of paper handy so you can jot down everything that distracts you during the workweek. Then on Friday, review the list and ask yourself, “How can I remove, decrease, or delegate these distractions to a better time if at all?

Keep it Nice and Simple

Getting work done that really matters consists of simply doing the right thing the right way over a sustained period of time. And the best way for you to gain clarity on those steps is to first create an environment where it’s hard to fail.

Strip away the distractions, heighten your focus, and get to work.

How I Learned the Importance of Emotional Intelligence

During my last year of drama school my class was paid a visit by a gentleman asked to speak about the business of acting. I remember all 17 of us sitting at full attention, furiously jotting notes in an effort to soak up as much as we could on how to break into the fiercely competitive world of storytelling. And though I appreciated what the seasoned casting director had to say, there was a part of me that thought it all a bit silly.

For three years all I cared about was improving my craft as an actor. The notion of having to network or invest in business cards wasn’t even on my radar. My concerns rarely went beyond memorizing a Shakespeare sonnet or scrounging for rehearsal space. 

All I wanted to do was act, and if possible, get paid to do so. I figured talent and hard work were enough to thrive in this industry. I believed with the right focus and preparation I could simply will my way to the top.

But just two years after that workshop I found myself sitting on a park bench in a complete daze. I felt like I’d been sucker punched.

“We’ve decided to no longer represent you,” the voice on the other end said. “But good luck.”

If there’s anything I’ve learned in pursuing an extraordinarily difficult dream and now entrepreneurship, it’s that your “why” must be sound, your “how” flexible, and your sense of self-awareness heightened.

I later realized one of the reasons I’d been let go was because I had failed to cultivate a business mindset. Sitting by the phone for the perfect part to magically land in my lap apparently wasn’t enough. I needed to up my game.

Opportunity comes to those who mobilize

Much as changed since that spring afternoon. Today, I no longer wait for opportunities but mobilize to create them. I also understand the importance of diversifying one’s knowledge in their chosen field. I have learned to leverage my strengths while being a shrewd judge of my shortcomings. And in the process, I’ve even grown to appreciate those weaknesses.

In other words, my understanding of the value of emotional intelligence has liberated me while making the work more enjoyable.

You don’t have to be great at everything

The truth is you’re not going to be good at everything, and that’s okay. I once asked by an exasperated supervisor if I was “sent by the enemy,” when I failed yet again to grasp the system at the homeless shelter he ran. 

Being moved by rousing speeches and fascinated by the world of foreign policy didn’t mean I was cut out for politics, as I learned during an internship in my mid-30s. 

And you can bet the cost of a ballpark beer that I’ll never hit a baseball out of the Oakland Coliseum.

Today I’m okay with those realities, while just a few years ago any talk of limitations would have compelled me to work harder. I choose to focus on my strengths, while learning the skills needed to grow both personally and professionally. 

As a result, my efforts have become more deliberate and focused.

Today, it’s so tempting to believe our trajectories must be congruent with the ones getting all the headlines. Spend a few minutes on any social media platform and it’s nearly impossible to sidestep news of the next billion-dollar start-up or rocket launch, which seem designed to make you feel like you aren’t working hard enough.

But wanting to emulate someone’s journey because of the notoriety it draws isn’t enough. If there’s anything I’ve learned in pursuing an extraordinarily difficult dream and now entrepreneurship, it’s that your “why” must be sound, your “how” flexible, and your sense of self-awareness heightened.   

Unfortunately, it’s not hip to admit we’re not brilliant at everything. We’re led to believe failure should be avoided at all costs and that if we can’t be great at something it’s not worth pursuing. But the truth is there is profound courage in vulnerability. 

The ability to look within and assess how we can best make an impact requires a rare kind of honest introspection. And knowing ourselves helps us better understand how to leverage our gifts to create more value for others. The tricky part is trying to figure out just how to do that.

Failure is wisdom masquerading as discouragement

In an interview with Larry King, serial entrepreneur and speaker Gary Vaynerchuk was asked how one learns self-awareness. “I don’t know,” he said. “But I know it’s damn important.” So, if one can’t be taught how to best assess their strengths and take ownership of their weaknesses, what do we do?

In my experience, the key has been learning to fall in love with failure. What I learned in an industry where you’re told “No” virtually 99% of the time is that not getting what you want is not a testament to your self-worth or even your talent. It’s merely feedback; another tool to assess where you are and where you need to be.

If you can hone the ability to not take failure personally, it can work in your favor. First, it can be a stepping-stone to building resilience and in the process a singular type of character. One learns to not take exclusion as a character flaw, or worse, let it inhibit forward progress.

Second, massive failure can help clarify a new path you may have never considered or even realized you were equipped to take. My acting career might not have panned out exactly as planned, but being trained in the art of storytelling has supplied me with the tools to share my message through writing, speaking, and consulting. 

But I would have never made the shift if my thinking had been inflexible or if I hadn’t been attentive to my sense of self.  

Allow your curiosity to be constantly piqued, particularly when it comes to your self. And though it would take several lifetimes to simply scratch the surface of what makes us whole, it is still a noble and worthy pursuit. Recognizing our limitations is key, but through trial and error we may even discover that we’re not as limited as we thought, especially in arenas we have yet to consider. 

We all have something of value to contribute, and no matter how long it takes to find, it’s worth striving for.        

* This article was previously published on Goalcast.com on November 21, 2017

Embrace the Suck

I spoke with a close friend yesterday about something entrepreneurs like to call, "Embracing the suck." It's the idea that the actual day-to-day grind of being in the trenches and committing ourselves fully to a dream often involves doing things that aren't really fun. 

Still, we do it because we have a bigger picture in mind. We're in it for the long game sort of speak.

I've discovered that people are happiest when they feel a sense of progress. And meaningful progress comes from stretching ourselves and striving toward goals that make us question whether we have what it takes. Actor Cillian Murphy once remarked that if there wasn't at least a small part of him that doubted he could play a role it wasn't worth taking.

During my days at drama school I'd often arrive at the theater at 5:30 in the morning to work on monologues, movement, or my diction. Was getting there at that insane hour enjoyable? I can't say that it was, but the result filled me with the satisfaction I'd given everything I had toward achieving a larger goal.