It's Not Your Problem

The world of an artist has long been associated with adversity. Ask any actor, writer, singer, painter, or dancer how they embellish their latest artistic endeavors to keep the patience of their parents at bay, and you are certain to get some creative stories. Let's face it, being an actor is hard. In addition to the struggles around finding work there is often the need to fend off not only your own doubts but the ones from friends and family who question the validity of your dreams. 

I recognize how fortunate I've been in cultivating a circle of friends who are wildly supportive. They recognize my victories and on occasion voice their admiration. It's not necessary but it' sure is nice to hear from time to time. 

Still, there is a small percentage of people in my life who simply don't get what I'm trying to do. Never have. Never will. Sitting in a cafe for an hour and half to work on a screenplay, or spending a few hours polishing a monologue in a drab black box theater doesn't make much sense to them. It can be hurtful because we naturally want the people closest to us to appreciate our passion - our calling.

But the older I get the more I've learned to lean on those who support and not share my dreams with those who don't. Admittedly, this can be a tricky balance since the latter can come in the form of dear friends, or even family. What I've learned is this:

-- No matter what you do with your life there will never be a consensus that it's time well spent. Even the most conventional paths have doubters as do the folks we associate most with fame, money, and success. We shouldn't judge what we don't understand, but we do. As a result, if you're around a community of people who critique for that reason it's time to find a new one.

-- Second, and most importantly, if someone doesn't appreciate or understand your need to write, paint, dance, act, sing, sculpt, or create IT'S NOT YOUR PROBLEM. It's not your job to be a molder of consensus but to be a master craftsman and share your gifts with those who appreciate them. Doing anything for validation is a no-win game. It's never-ending, unfulfilling, and impossible to sustain. 

Own YOUR path. 

Be selective with those you share your aspirations with. 

And remember, it's not you that's got the problem. 

Your Subconscious Knows

If there's one thing about pursuing a life in the arts it's that it's very easy to get discouraged. The lack of opportunities, the constant rejection, and the fierce competition can take start to really take it's toll. But through all of that adversity I've learned it's also crucial to have impeccable word - to speak consistent messages of self-empowerment. We can positive and optimistic, while still being grounded.

I've found when your words are not congruent to your actions it becomes very difficult to build serious momentum. You may really believe in your ability as a writer, actor, or dancer but if your inner monologue is not in harmony with those sentiments you have a problem. 

Though you may continue to work hard, diligently improve you craft, and continue auditioning, if you're saying things like, "No wonder I wasn't cast," or "My career is going nowhere," you won't be firing on all cylinders. 

Your subconscious somehow knows it's being duped. Try getting your mind and your actions in harmony and see what happens.

Dance Dance Dance

Ever been sitting at party while everyone else is on the dance floor cutting up a rug? A friend notices you nursing a drink and catches your eye. You immediately gaze toward the floor because you know exactly what that look means - she wants you to stop being a stick in the mud and dance.

"I'm not much of a dancer," you claim. But she insists and it is after all a celebration. You reluctantly get to your feet as she takes you by the hand. Slowly you make your way to the dance floor as the classic hip hop hits of your adolescence blare in the background. Maybe this won't be so bad, you think.

Before long you're half stepping, maybe even doing The Hustle. But you're not really moving. You straddle the fence and as a result your moves are awkward and irregular. You can't seem to find the beat.

Dancing is a perfect example of something we can't half ass. You're either in, or you're out. If you're playing the middle you look non-committal and your intentions are unclear.

Even if you're not exactly Fred Astaire, when you commit, at least you've made the choice to fully invest in what you're doing. You may miss a step or two but at least now you're in a position to learn, to grow, and adjust accordingly to what's around you.

If you're going to dance then dance.