Constructive Confrontation

In Andrew S. Grove's book, Only the Paranoid Survive he reveals how he navigated Intel, the semiconductor manufacturing company through a massive change in the industry. One of the many ideas in his book that struck me was the concept of "constructive confrontation." He says the following:

We became good at solving problems. We became highly focused on tangible results (our word for it is "output"). And from all the early bickering, we developed a style of ferociously arguing with one another while remaining friends.

Many people thrive on confrontation but I would venture to say most avoid it like the plague. We're wired for survival which is dependent on our ability to thrive in a community. And when we rock the boat it's less likely that we'll be asked to stick around.

But over the years I've seen my relationships deepen and evolve because we did risk speaking or minds instead of simply going along to get along. In fact, I've grown to respect people I already admired a great deal for doing so even though I may not have agreed with a single word they said. I respected their need to be heard but more importantly understood.

I'm learning more and more the value of "going to the fear." It's the notion that because something is difficult or feels scary it's not only worth doing but probably something you can't afford not to.

Speak your mind thoughtfully, constructively, and politely and there's a good chance all parties will be the better for it.