A few years ago a friend called me in a bit of panic. "Do you have time for a quick coffee? I really need to talk to someone," he said.
So we met up at a popular little cafe on the corner of 26th and 7th avenue. We sat by the window as I listened to him describe a problem he'd been struggling with for quite some time. I sat. And sat. And sat before he finally stopped to ask, "So what do you think?"
Just a few moments into my very broad assessment he stopped me. "I don't agree," he said. "Wait a minute," I shot back. "I came out to meet you. I politely listened to what you had to say. You asked me my opinion and now I'm giving you my honest take. Please don't ask me what I think and then criticize it because you don't like what I have to say." He nodded, apologized, and thankfully we moved on.
Two nights ago the roles were reversed. I sat listening to a very successful entrepreneur offer his take on my business goals and personal website. 'It sucks," he told me. "It's nice to look at but I don't understand what you're trying to say. It's all over the place."
I realized in that instant I had an opportunity to defend myself and tell him I was underwhelmed by his website. But I didn't.
This gentlemen had taken time to speak with me for free at the end of a very long day. And though I didn't agree with everything he had to say there was undoubtedly a great deal I could learn from him.
I learned the importance of both following your own advice and having the integrity to just be quiet and hear some one out first, even if you disagree. I could decide afterward which bits of advice to sift through and what to incorporate.
The point is, there's a teachable moment in every situation, encounter, and environment. If we're too busy defending our ego we'll miss it.
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